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A conversation with The Lodger

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Lodger, where are your legs?
I don’t know.
Where did Mummy leave them?
I don’t know.
Da.
Yes Lodger.
Why do you need them?
To put them on you.
Why?
So we can go out.
Why? Where are we going?
To the shop.
What shop?
The fish shop.
Why?
To buy fish.
Why are we buying fish?
For lunch.
I love fish. I love lunch. Where are my legs?

Obviously not his actual legs. They are attached to him, luckily. Enough issues without removable legs. The Lodgers legs are his action boots, his plastic leg holders that help support his ankles while we wait for the muscles to grow. 
I’m wondering if they ever will.

The Lodgers Action Boots

Where’s the fish shop?
Near the hotel.
What hotel?
The swimming hotel. (Where we have gone swimming)
Why?
Because it is.
Why?
Look a bird. 

The art of ongoing distraction 101. Sometimes.

Where?
You missed him.
Where?
Over there.
I don’t see him, Da. Da. I don’t see him. What bird?

Distraction failure. Next attempt.

We’ve to go to the other shop first.
What shop?
The food shop.
Why?
To buy food.
Why?
Food for dinner.
I love dinner. What’s for dinner?
I don’t know yet.
Fish for lunch?
Yes.
Da, fish for lunch?
Yes. Will we buy broccoli for dinner?
I love broccoli for dinner. What else?
Oh we need mayonnaise.
Yum, I love mayonnaise and broccoli for dinner. I love it. I love dinner. Where’s my snack?
In the bag.
What is it?
A surprise.
Yum, I love surprise. Where will we have it?
I don’t know.
No don’t know.
It’s a surprise.
Ok, I love surprises. I love my snack. I like when you mind me. Do you like broccoli? 
Please stop talking.
Ok.

***Silence***

7 seconds later.....

Da.
Yes.
Do you have my snack?
Yes.
Where will we have it?
You know where.
Where?
Surprise.
I love surprises. What is it?
Surprise.

Yummy surprise. 
Da.
Yes.
Where is the fish shop?




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